woke up early today. a horrific dream happened to me today, and I can't sleep after that.
kita selalu baca orang Palestin, Iraq, Lubnan, Syria jadi tahanan dalam rumah sendiri. Penjahat (*baca Yahudi) masuk kedalam rumah, claiming it's their soil, and force you to get out of your own house. bukan selalu baca benda ni kita bayangkan diri kita dalam keadaan sedara-mara kita kat nun jauh sana tu. kita assume, okay kot. selamat kot. ada orang selamatkan kot. KOT.... the safe assumption, just because we don't know. or worst... don't really care.
last night, I dreamt of being a hostage in my own house. bayangkan, tengah chill hari ahad with family dalam rumah, tengah melayan anak-anak buah mewarna, mom and dad tengah bergurau, adik-beradik lain doing their own stuff dalam rumah. suddenly, a team of I don't know who, barged in... lengkap dengan senapang and magazines, and tetiba semua dah kena tahan.
me, and few others tersekat dalam bilik tepi yang penjahat tu x perasan. and like a movie, we got a gun. not knowing what will happen, my brother suggested that we kill ourselves. I was like... WHAT??
no time to explain, he shot my sister, and shot himself. I was left alone to decide. do I kill myself and just let this thing go. the chance to save other people in other room is a chance that I no longer have as an option.. I thought, well, I have no skills whatsoever, so it's dumb for me to fight those gun equipped team that has barged into my house.
the sad part is......
I KILLED MYSELF.
like seriously. all I thought was to get out of those stressful moments where I don't have a choice to save my family, and save myself from torture by killing myself.
and I did it.
before I shot myself in the head, I even asked myself, will god accept me to his heaven? because I know He won't accept people who killed himself. but I went through it anyway.
as I woke up. I cried. thinking that I have zero bravery, unlike my brothers and sisters in Syria and Palestine, they stayed strong, mempertahankan rumah sendiri and they chose not to kill themselves even though they had nothing to eat, and held hostage in their own homes.
if I am going to dream about it again... I guess I would not kill myself, and try to save my family in the other rooms. yes, I have to. they are family. and I have to fight for them. not leaving them.
I'm sorry for the sad post. but when this happened it really makes you think. what are you going to do if you're faced with the same situation?
I end my post by... WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO IF THIS HAPPENED TO YOU?
salam alaik hee~ xpenah buat tech review lagi selama ni. I guess I'm starting now. nak dijadikan cerita, sebelum ni pakai Huawei Asc...
salam alaik to begin.. HI is Health Inspector.... so, to recap... dan 3 bulan dah jadi HI, and it had been fun. (*feeling awesome smbil dg...
Salam alaik. Haa. Dah masuk 9 bulan dah pakai Samsung Galaxy A7. For those yg nk baca review asal boleh baca kat sini . Now, for those...
Salam Now it has been 12 months I've been working as Hygiene Inspector... not an easy task, but I'll manage. Working under a lot...
Salam alaik.. Glad to say that I ended a 'whatever'ship that I had with someone. I even had the courage to confess about my...
Salam alaik If you can write about the mistakes that you've done and you wish that you could have known that, before you made that mis...
salam alaik. kali ni no more nak bagitau berapa lama dah tak menulis dekat sini. sebab sekarang dah masuk tahun baru, so kira start buku b...
salam alaik woke up early today. a horrific dream happened to me today, and I can't sleep after that. kita selalu baca orang Palesti...
salam alaik noting the day is at 18th december 2015... this is my 26th year of my life .. i think i have to state down my target for nex...